The Yellowfang and Honeyfern Show
by Indigo Archer
Summary: Yellowfang and Honeyfern of Thunderclan are starting a Talkshow and interviewing cats from all of the clans! (Including Starclan of course) Stay tuned for Drama, Humor and Edgy Commentary!
1. Firestar, Sandstorm and Spottedleaf

**Hey Guys!**

 **So the other day I was listening to this super funny talkshow, and they were roleplaying some characters and insulting each other, and I was like: What book has enough characters that I could play around with this idea? Here we are!**

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 **On a related note, Yellowfang's snarky comments in many of these Episodes are based off of me.**

 **My friend, (Who I am going to codename Goldensun...** _You know who you are_ **), represents Honeyfern. Though I mostly wrote the story, I acknowledge the parts that she did write and the ideas she gave me. Thanks Goldensun.**

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 **Disclaimer: These characters all belong to Erin Hunter or else this wouldn't be called Fanfiction**

* * *

A grey she-cat sat in a red chair, watching her new partner spin around in her blue one.

"Honeyfern!" Yellowfang snapped. "Stop spinning unless you want me to bite you!"

"Fine." she mumbled.

"The show starts in 3… 2… 1!" The camera cat said.

"Welcome to the very first episode of the Yellowfang and Honeyfern Show! I'm your host, Yellowfang, and that's my co-host, Honeyfer-" she turned to Honeyfern, who was busy eating a mouse. "Great StarClan! Are you eating again?"

"I was hungry." she muttered.

Yellowfang turned, irritated, back to the camera. "And that's my co-host, Honeyfern, the food pit with no hole. The Yellowfang and Honeyfern Show is where we interview cats from all the Four Clans, and-" she was interrupted as Honeyfern groaned from her left.

"One mouse too many."

Yellowfang facepalmed. "I can't do this! You know what? Scratch the introduction! Let's just bring in our guests. Drumroll please! Firestar, Sandstorm and Spottedleaf!"

The three ThunderClan cats walked on stage and sat in the chairs diagonal to the two hosts.

"So Firestar, first question. Is it true that you liked Spottedleaf when you were young?" Yellowfang asked, knowing the answer anyways.

"Yes." The red tom answered cautiously. "I honestly don't think I ever got over her. She was my first love, and her death split my heart in two."

Spottedleaf looked silently down at her paws, and the tip of Sandstorm's tail twitched.

"What about Sandstorm?" Honeyfern asked, fumbling for her question cards.

Firestar looked at his mate carefully. "She's different from Spottedleaf, that's why I love her. She felt that she didn't need to act like Spottedleaf to get me to love her, and I fell for her in my own time."

"Is it awkward to have both of them in the same room as you?"

"Yes." he answered truthfully.

Yellowfang shifted in her seat. "Sandstorm, when did you first fall in love with Firestar?"

The pale ginger she-cat sighed. "Probably after he saved my life during the skirmish with RiverClan."

"What about you, Spottedleaf?"

"When he first entered the clearing. Here was this bold kitty-pet, walking into the heart of ThunderClan as if he owned the place. Then he fought Longtail and won his honor..." the she-cat trailed off. "I knew we had no future together, so I didn't lead him on."

"But you didn't say no either!" Sandstorm snarled.

"Well look at how you welcomed him into the Clan! By teasing and bullying him!"

"That's it!" she growled, unsheathing her claws. Sandstorm leaped towards Spottedleaf, who scrambled out of the way. Yellowfang and Firestar leaped in between them, attempting to stop the two hissing she-cats.

"WELLTHAT'SALLTHETIMEWEHAVE!" Honeyfern yelped into the camera. "See you next time on THE HONEYFERN AND YELLOWFANG SHOW!"


	2. Ashfur

**Hello People!**

 **Episode Two is up... NOW!**

 **Sorry it's a little short.**

 **0o0**

 **Shoutout to my editor, (Who's codename is Rose,** _you know who you are..._ **), Thanks so much! And guess what? I put her in this story too! She's the camera cat, Pinetail, Who I DO OWN.**

 **0o0**

 **I still do not own Warriors, that ingenious work of art belongs to Erin Hunter =)**

 **But I will tell you if that changes :P**

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Yellowfang read her questions carefully. "Are you sure this is a good idea, Pinetail?" she asked, turning towards the camera cat. "He seems a little mentally unstable."

"Now why would you say that?" she asked mildly.

"Oh, I don't know… Maybe because he tried to murder Hollyleaf, Lionblaze and Jayfeather. Not to mention Firestar and possibly Squirrelflight."

"Okay, so he may not be the _sanest_ cat in all of the four Clans, but it will be interesting to see what he says."

Yellowfang snorted. "Interesting, yes that's one word for it."

Pinetail sighed. "Just don't provoke him. Can you handle that?"

The gray she-cat's tail lashed, but she kept her mouth shut as she sat down in her chair. "Welcome to The Yellowfang and Honeyfern Show. I'm Yellowfang and that's Honeyfern, your hosts!"

"Let's give Ashfur a warm welcome!" Honeyfern said.

Hesitant applause started scattering through the clearing as the pale gray tom walked on stage and sat in his chair.

"So Ashfur, do you still have feelings for Squirrelflight?" Yellowfang asked.

"I HATE SQUIRRELFLIGHT!" he howled.

"Did you ever get over her?" Honeyfern inquired.

"I LOVE SQUIRRELFLIGHT!" Ashfur yowled. "Or do I hate her?"

"Now _I'm_ confused." Honeyfern muttured.

"What do you think of Jayfeather, Hollyleaf and Lionblaze?" Yellowfang asked, glaring at Honeyfern.

"I HATE THEM!"

Honeyfern glanced down at her question cards. "What about Bramblestar?"

Ashfur shrugged. "I liked him okay. I reasoned it wasn't his fault that Squirrelflight loved him, or that he loved her back." his eyes narrowed. "Though he did take my spot as deputy. Hmmmm..." he pondered. "So maybe I _do_ hate him."

"MAKE UP YOUR MIND, ASHFUR!" Honeyfern screamed, clutching her head like it was about to explode.

"Well," Yellowfang said calmly, ignoring Ashfur and Honeyfern's screaming in the background. The screaming got louder, and Yellowfang had to yell to drown it out. "SEE YOU NEXT TIME ON THE YELLOWFANG AND HONEYFERN SHOW!"


	3. Jayfeather

**Hullo.**

 **I love Jayfeather =)))**

 **So**

 **I**

 **Just**

 **Had**

 **To**

 **Give**

 **Him**

 **An**

 **Episode.**

 **0o0**

 **I do not own Warriors and this disclaimer is starting to make me question my life choices.**

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"Is that fun, or are you just trying to be an idiot?" Yellowfang asked Honeyfern, as the young she-cat started spinning around in her chair. Again.

The cameras flashed on.

Honeyfern stopped spinning. "Welcome to The Honeyfern and Yellowfang show!"

Yellowfang scowled.

"I'm Honeyfern and the grumpy old she-cat over there is Yellowfang!" she said cheerfully.

"I am not old!" Yellowfang hissed. "Nor am I grumpy!"

Honeyfern eyed her skeptically. "Speaking of grumpy, here is our guest, Jayfeather!"

"You brought _him_ in?" Yellowfang spat. "A spying tom who can never think of anyone but himself?!"

"A pleasure as always, Yellowfang." Jayfeather snapped, walking on stage. "It's good to see that you haven't lost your sense of humor."

"FIRST QUESTION," Honeyfern interrupted, before Yellowfang could retort. "What is it like being blind, Jayfeather?"

"It's okay. But to be fair, I've never known anything else, so I guess my opinion doesn't really count for much, does it?" he looked faintly amused.

"Have you ever been jealous of Hollyleaf and Lionblaze?" Yellowfang muttured.

"Yes. For example, when Lionblaze got Ashfur as a mentor, we didn't know of his treachery yet, and I got Brightheart-"

"HEY!" Brightheart and Cloudtail called at the same time from the audience.

"Sorry, Brightheart!" he called. "Or when Hollyleaf quit being medicine cat apprentice to become a warrior, and I had to take her place," Jayfeather paused. "I actually might have been more mad than jealous though."

"How did feel to spy in other cat's dreams?" Yellowfang growled, her teeth bared.

"Yellowfang!" Honeyfern cried. "That's not in the script!"

"I. Don't. Care!" Yellowfang snapped.

"Well I never got to have the full experience, since you kept on appearing at the worst moments!" Jayfeather retorted.

"To stop you from doing anything you would regret later on!"

Honeyfern sighed. "Yellowfang! Can't you go thirty seconds without quarreling with Jayfeather?"

Yellowfang hissed. "I'll show you quarreling!" she launched herself at Jayfeather.

"YELLOWFANG!" Honeyfern yelled. "You can't attack guests!'

"WATCH ME!" she yowled back.

Honeyfern turned back to the camera. "Oh just cut."


	4. Firestar and Tigerstar

**I don't know why, but I just really love this chapter :)**

 **I have top secret project that I'm working on, and I can't wait to share it with you all!**

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 **I started an Instagram account! ( ) follow it to know when I update my stories and more news on my top secret project XD**

 **0o0**

 **Disclaimer: Warriors and all it's characters belong to Erin Hunter (Nothing has changed)**

* * *

"Now I'm really starting to think you're crazy." Yellowfang told Pinetail. "You invited both of them at the same time?"

Pinetail rolled her eyes. "On the air in 3… 2… 1!"

Yellowfang smiled at the camera. "Welcome back to the Yellowfang and Honeyfern show! I'm your host, Yellowfang, and that's Honeyfern. Today our two guests are Firestar and Tigerstar."

Murmurs spread through the audience as the two toms walked on stage and took their respective places.

"Okay, so our first question is for Firestar," Yellowfang said. "What did you think of the prophecy Bluestar told you about?"

"I was confused. Why would a former kittypet like me be in a prophecy?"

"Tigerstar, why did you kill Redtail in the first place?" Yellowfang asked.

"Haven't you read the books?" Tigerstar growled. "I thought Bluestar would make me deputy!"

"But she chose Lionheart instead." Firestar finished for him. Tigerstar bared his fangs at his old enemy.

"Why did you keep trying to frame Ravenpaw as a traitor?" Honeyfern asked, her voice shaking slightly.

"The little squirt knew too much."

Yellowfang tensed in her seat. "What do you think of your kits?"

"Bramblestar, Tawnypelt, Mothwing and Hawkfrost," Honeyfern listed. "I don't know if you count Tadpole, since he's dead."

"I only have one kit." Tigerstar snarled.

"But- but you have five." Honeyfern stammered.

"Tawnypelt disowned herself from me after the battle with BloodClan, Mothwing became a stupid medicine cat, and Bramblestar's too soft. I don't know about Tadpole, he never had a chance to become strong like me."

Firestar looked horrified. "You're a horrible father!"

"Yeah, because your daughters turned out so well." Tigerstar spat.

"At least I didn't try to corrupt all my kits!"

"Leafpool had kits with a dirty WindClan cat, then asked Squirrelflight to lie to Bramblestar about them, resulting in my son's broken heart, and my three adoptive grand-kits, including the useless blind medicine cat, to fall into a weird state of depression. Lionblaze ended as a disappointment as well." the former ShadowClan leader added distastefully. "At least Hollyleaf had the guts to actually kill a cat!"

"Jayfeather is not useless!" Firestar flared. "He's just as sharp as most of the cats in the four Clans. As for Lionblaze, he's the best fighter I've ever seen!"

"Lionblaze is just as soft as Brambleclaw!" Tigerstar shot back.

"At least they're not a heartless brute like you!" Firestar retorted. The two toms leaped out of their chairs and started circling around each other.

Yellowfang sighed and leaned back in her chair. Honeyfern looked terrified.

"I'm frankly impressed you lived long enough to meet your grand-kits." Tigerstar growled.

"I'm surprised you were dumb enough to trust a rogue cat. Most of all Scourge!" Firestar said.

"Bluestar must have really been out of good warriors for her to chose _you_ as her deputy."

"Well as I see it, you didn't stay deputy very long, did you Tigerstar?"

"A kittypet leading a Clan!" Tigerstar snorted. "The shame ThunderClan must have felt!"

Firestar hissed dangerously as Tigerstar brought up his kittypet roots. The fiery tom flung himself onto the dead warrior, spitting mad.

"Why does the fighting always happen when _he's_ on?" Honeyfern asked. Looking upset, she glanced at the fiery ThunderClan leader.

Yellowfang sighed again, getting out of her chair and walking off stage. "You take this one, Pinetail." she called over her shoulder.

Pinetail paused the camera, rolling her eyes. "Leave the easy stuff for me, why don't you?" she grumbled.

* * *

 **To those who suggested interviews: Thank you! I hadn't thought about those characters.**

 **Keep Reviewing! I do read them, and they make my day!**


	5. Brokenstar and Crookedstar

**Sorry it took me so long to update. I've actually had this chapter written for a long time but then I went through some personal stuff so I forgot. Sorry :)**

 **0o0**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Warriors ;)**

* * *

"Why won't you tell me who our guests are?" Yellowfang asked.

Honeyfern winced. "Pinetail advised that it would be wise to keep you in the dark until a few

minutes before the show."

* _Two minutes before the show_ *

" _WHAT?!_ " Yellowfang screamed.

* _One minute and thirteen seconds before the show_ *

" _UNBELIEVABLE! I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU-_ "

* _One minute before the show_ *

" _INSUBORDINATION!_ " Yellowfang yelled.

* _Thirty seconds before the show_ *

BASH! CRASH! BANG! BOOM!

"Yellowfang!"

BANG! BASH! BOOM! CRASH!

"YELLOWFANG!"

 _Hollyleaf ends up with her paw and tail in a cast and Pinetail has a severe concussion._

 _Yellowfang looks smug._

* _Show starts_ *

"Welcome to the Yellowfang and Honeyfern Show!" Yellowfang said, smiling. "I'm your host,

Yellowfang. Regrettably, an _unfortunate_ accident left Hollyleaf in so much pain that she can't

speak, so I'll be doing the talking." she beamed. "Today, we have no guests, and-"

"Not a chance!" Pinetail yelled from behind the camera.

"Shut up Pinetail!"

Hollyleaf pressed a button on a remote next to her, and words appeared on the screen behind

them: _PLEASE WELCOME OUR GUESTS, RAGGEDSTAR AND BROKENSTAR._

Yellowfang glared at her as the two toms walked onto the stage and sat in their chairs.

 _SO, BROKENSTAR, YOU KILLED YOUR OWN FATHER AND ALMOST YOUR MOTHER._

 _WHAT MOTIVATED YOU TO DO THAT?_

Raggedstar sighed.

"Well, I wanted to be leader." he said, shrugging.

"You killed your father because he was in your way." Yellowfang said flatly.

He smiled coldly. "Fair enough, mother."

Yellowfang growled. "How did it feel when you got driven out be an apprentice?"

Hollyleaf sighed. _STILL NOT A QUESTION IN THE SCRIPT._

Brokenstar snarled. "That puny apprentice just got lucky."

"That _puny apprentice_ is Firestar." Yellowfang snapped.

"That pathetic excuse for cat? He's a kittypet! He has no right to be a clan cat, much less a

leader! But then again, maybe a kittypet is the highest standard possible for Thunderclan."

"Firestar is a more noble cat then you'll ever be! And he was a much better leader than you

were!"

"Nonsense!"

Hollyleaf stepped in the middle of the two of them. _I THINK WE HAVE TIME FOR ONE MORE_

 _QUESTION. CROOKEDSTAR, HOW DID IT FEEL WHEN YOU WERE MURDERED BY-_

"BROKENSTAR!" Yellowfang yelled. "How could you murder your _father_?!"

"Wasn't that question for _me_?" Crookedstar muttured.

Hollyleaf sighed and stepped in front of the camera. All that was heard for the rest of the

episode was Yellowfang and Brokenstar screeching and screaming at each other. Then the

claws came out and Pinetail stopped recording.

* * *

 **Please review :)**

 **I love reviews**

 **They make my day**


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